I Am Jacks Wasted Life

What Renaissance Performer are you?
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Ah yes, the Renaissance Festival.

Two weeks ago, I went out at the request of my former Puppet Troupe compatriots, and we had an “old school, kick your ass puppet shift”. Butch, George, Eric and I ran around for almost an hour in ye olde body puppets. It was an inordinate amount of fun.

Butch pulled out the Drunken King, a bit which has been known to cripple me with laughter. Butch & George also did the bit where the King is presenting Shirley the Jester’s jokes, and then explaining them… my favorite exchange is this:

Shirley: “Knock, Knock.”

Patron: “Who’s There?”

Shirley: “Chinese interrupting cow. “

Patron: “Chinese interr…”

Shirley: “MAO!“

King: “You see, Chairman Mao, of China, is outside your door, AND HE’S A COW!!!“

I had a good time with some of my old bits as well. I have always liked just playing with the physicality of the puppets. I mean, as Butch says, you’re 11 feet tall! It’s amazing how funny it is just to see someone in a puppet just swinging their arms while they walk… I usually try and find a way to lay down….. after all, the Wizard is OLD.

The two subsequent weekends have been less eventful. We’ve been trying to get some of the multitude of house projects under control. One of said projects is an outdoorsy activity, and the weather has not really been cooperating. AT ALL.

Yeah, right, I wish

Being a robot would be kinda wicked-awesome methinks. However, I am not. I am a fragile little human who is slowly but surely getting old.

OK, and now for not quite so much of a secret…

I’m a bad blogger.

No. Really. It’s been like a biollionty years since I’ve been here. (Don’t look at the actual dates, just go with me…)

But truly dear reader ( yes singular), it’s not you… it’s me.

I get all busy and then I get all worked up about making something interesting… but if both William Gibson and Kevin Smith can fall off teh blogging wagon and get right back on then so can I. Right?

Rhetorical question, smartass.

Anyways, what’s up all? It seems like I’ve been running around like crazy lately. I ended up working a full-time contract at a company that turned around and outsourced their helpdesk to India. Le Sigh. This is getting a little tiresome no? (see Rhetorical, above)

So, I now have a new contract doing some spiffy Security Adminstration work. They are actually talking about changing our job title to System Administrator, which I have no complaints about. (Resume is being update in Word as we speak…)

Speaking of bad bloggers, The Brother got married. I don’t know if he’s updated his page in any less than a billionty years himself, but we make allowances…

However, for better or for worse (see what I did there) I am going to endeavor to maintain my online presence a bit more in the future. In part because I have a new part time gig to promote… ….

wait for it…

I’m DJing Karaoke at the Chatterbox Pub on Sunday, Monday, and Wednesday nights!!!

Ok, maybe I built that up a bit too much…

Nonetheless, It is so, and I’m enjoying the hell out of it. So check out the MySpace page for the calendar to see if I’m at your favorite local watering hole that night.

And check back here frequently, because the internets are for pr0n communicating! And leave a comment or two for chrissakes! This ain’t no radio show!

What subcategory of Goth best fits you?
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Well, not really, but Raven & I have become Monday night regulars at the U Otter Stop Inn. This is entirely due to the fact that the Monday night host rawks. OK, it’s also because Benq and everlastingwhy frequent that night as well. And they’re Supa-Sweet.

So, we starting going to Karaoke. And for some reason I actually like singing at this bar. It’s kinda hole-in-the-wall tiny and the people are generally there for a good time but neither belligerent nor so drunk their “singing” painful.

Benq had told us about the “Otter Idol” contest that they’d had and how he got 2nd place. So when they announced Otter Idol 2 and touted free drinks as part of the process I said “Why not?”

So for 6 or 8 weeks (I’ve already forgotten.) I got up and sang a song. And for 6 or 8 weeks I am pretty certain I came in 4th place when only the top three qualified for the finals.

Every damn week.

Most weeks this was fine, as I didn’t necessarily feel that I deserved to be in the top three. But I would nearly half the time this was irksome, because I was pretty sure that I’d done better than some of the people who qualified. Regardless, every week I got up and sang something. I was at a bit of a disadvantage because I wasn’t ever into Karaoke before, and as such don’t really have any songs that I’m super comfortable with, so every week was a learning experience.

A few days before the finals I got a call from Toni saying that one of the finalists couldn’t participate and that since I had the highest point totals of any of the non-qualifiers that I could participate in the finals. (Raven qualified early on, with a bondage-y rendition of Sweet Dreams whilst she was wearing The Dress.) So I had to pick a song.

I was originally thinking it would be awesome to do Bad Touch by Bloodhound Gang (Sometimes referred to as the “Discovery Channel Song”.) while wearing a monkey suit like the ones in the video. Obviously, the time was not right for that. I considered Beautiful Day by U2, for which I had earlier received some rave reviews. (While still not qualifying) Save Tonight by Eagle Eye Cherry was also pondered, before I decided on Sweet Transvestite from The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

I know the show really well, and while I didn’t necessarily feel up to dressing in lingerie, I did at least have a cape that was handy and some gothy sleeve things that look like the movie. They drew numbers to see what order we would sing in, and I ended up with number one.

So I got up, sang really well, and worked the crowd. It was awesome.

I’m pretty sure I ended up in fourth place.